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A note to future Besh on why Mommy and I were laughing the other night

January 28, 2010

Besh,

I know it probably didn’t make sense at the time and there’s no telling if you’ll remember this incident years from now when it may actually make sense. But just in case, I thought I’d help explain.

First, Mommy and I are exhausted. But you knew that. So bear in mind that this can make things a bit funnier than they are in reality. Still, this was pretty funny.

See, when we were hanging out watching “the singing show” (it’s actually called American Idol, by the way) I was holding Isaac so he didn’t wake up. Which means whatever position he fell asleep in–DON’T MOVE. This is crucial. Because as much as you can explain to a 5-week old that a new position is just as comfortable as the previous one, they don’t listen. And returning them to the former position no longer works. I’m sure there’s a scientific proof out there about this, you can go and Google it. Or whatever you use in the future if not Google.

So after sitting with Isaac on my arm for a bit, when it finally was time to move for bath time, I shifted my arm and two horrendously loud snaps came out of various joints. I groaned because they weren’t the kind of snaps that relieve pressure, they were the kind of snaps that hurt (not permanently, nothing broken, just…OW).

You, being the sweet boy you are, immediately asked “What’s wrong, Daddy?”

I, of course, responded back, “Nothing’s wrong. My arm just cracked.”

You slid off the bed and came over to the chair, such a serious and curious look on your face. And you politely asked your question.

“Can I see your crack?”

Perfectly legitimate question from your perspective. But by now you probably know that crack generally refers to, well, another part of anatomy most often found on plumbers. Your mom and I knew this, which is why we laughed a little bit.

You, not understanding what was funny, continued to ask.

“I want to see your crack. Show me your crack. Where is your crack?”

This made us laugh more. But not wanting to laugh too hard and wake up Isaac, we were both holding it in. Not well, but trying.

“What? What’s so funny? Show me your crack!”

At this point we were both crying. Not because crack is a sad thing (it can be) but we were crying from laughter. There’s nothing quite like being sleep deprived and having a four-year-old honestly and earnestly ask to see your crack.

Hopefully that makes a bit more sense now, if you even remember it.

And no, I’m still not showing you.

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Why the world should fear toddler moviemakers

January 13, 2010

Given Besh’s love of musical theater, not at all due to Sara or myself, there was little doubt that he’d be interested in signing up for an afterschool program for toddlers where they learn to act, do puppets, and get to make a short movie over the semester. I told him about the program and I don’t think I finished the description before he wanted to sign up for it. So, having signed him up last week, I definitely felt the need to correct him during this conversation on Monday.

Besh: “Daddy, am I going to die?”

Me: “What? Why would you say that?”

“Because people die.”

“That’s true.”

“You know when you die you take one last deep breathe and then you die and then they bury you.”

“That’s right.”

“Like Jerry Orbach. They’re going to bury him.”

“Actually, he died a while ago and they already buried him.”

“Oh. Oh, that’s right. They put him on the screen and then they buried him.” (We have an old Broadway DVD with some Jerry Orbach moments that he likes to watch)

“That’s right, we have a movie of him.”

“How’d they do that?”

“They used a camera, just like the camera we use to take pictures of you. They had a camera and they took a video and put it through a computer and then it was a movie we could watch at home.”

“Oh, I want to do that. I’ll take a camera and then make a movie and then put it on the screen.”

“That sounds like fun.”

“Yeah. And then somebody gets to die.”

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Strawberry icing gets no love and toddler study habits

December 31, 2009

Sadly, two stories. Because if the two could be combined, it’d be much funnier. Still, this will have to do for the last post of 2009.

There’s been much conversation about Besher’s upcoming fourth birthday. Mostly to keep him excited and overcome any expected feelings of being overwhelmed with all the attention Isaac is getting right around now. Yesterday the conversation turned to his birthday cake/cupcake. He’s gone back and forth on whether to have a giant cake or a lot of cupcakes. Yesterday he was firmly in the cake camp as Sara, Nonni, Besh and Isaac were in the car on the way to gymnastics camp.

Besh: “I want a big cake. And I want four candles, Mommy. Not one candle with the number four but four candles!”

Sara: “Okay, and what flavor do you want your cake to be?”

“I want chocolate cake with chocolate icing?” (Note from Ryan: I’m so proud)

Nonni: “You know what would be delicious, Besher? Chocolate cake with strawberry icing!”

“No, I do not think I would love that. I want chocolate icing.”

Cake thus determined and gym camp attended, I took Besh later that day on a Besher/Daddy adventure (Buy Buy Baby and Target–because “adventure” is just another word for “errands with spin”). On the drive home Besh and I had a conversation about mice and rats, discussing the various rodents from movies and tv shows we enjoyed.

Me: “You know who else is a mouse?”

Besh: “Who?”

“Mickey Mouse.”

“That’s right!”

“You know who else?”

“Who?”

“Donald Duck!”

“No, Daddy. Donald Duck is a duck.”

“Oh. That makes sense.”

“Who is the girl duck? The one with Donald?”

“Daisy Duck?”

“Yes, that’s correct! That’s the one!”

A few minutes pass.

“Daddy, what was her name again? The girl duck?”

“Daisy Duck.”

“That’s right. Thank you, Daddy. I need to remember it in case anybody asks me.”

Visions of Sam Kinnison in Back to School, hunched over desk, yelling at Rodney Dangerfield somehow screaming “What’s the name of Donald Duck’s girlfriend? Say it! SAY IT!” flew through my head.

“Well now you know.”

“Yes, now I know. Daisy Duck.”

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You think having a baby brother is exciting?

December 29, 2009

Yesterday Besh started gymnastics camp since his school is still out for winter break. He was thrilled to be going back (he’d been over the summer) and see several of his school friends. It’d been a busy week with lots of family, both local and long-distance, and filled with many evenings of walking to the neighborhood Christmas House (a neighborhood tradition, guy does his entire front and backyard with lights, Christmas animatronic dancing things, etc.–it’s pretty awesome). But getting back to a daily routine will ultimately be a good thing for everyone, and Besh was excited to get started.

As Sara brought Besh into the camp and was talking to his teachers she looked at Besh.

Sara: “Besh, did anything exciting happen this past week?”

Besh: “Oh, yes!”

“What happened?”

“We went to the CHRISTMAS HOUSE!!”

“Anything else?”

Besh thought about it.

“Nope.”

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First week as a big brother and why Isaac can’t juggle

December 28, 2009

For those that don’t know (although I’m not sure how you would know about this blog but not know the other thing), Besher’s little brother Isaac was born on December 18. We’ve been telling him about this day for quite some time but we were still a bit nervous about his actual reaction. It went as smoothly as we could hope.

First, we had great help from the extended family. While Nonni and Gamaw were at the hospital with Sara and I, Besher had a special Zayda adventure. Besher got to come to the hospital later in the day when Sara, Isaac and I were in the room. Besh came in and immediately wanted to hold Isaac. So he washed his hands and sat in the chair holding him for a few minutes. It was pretty great. Besh smiled at Isaac, kissed his head and said, “Hi, Isaac. I’m your big brother.”

While in the hospital, Besh was in charge of making people wash their hands before they held Isaac. He loved the assignment and has continued it at home. And he continues to be incredibly loving towards his brother. Yesterday I was changing a messy diaper and Isaac was crying so Besh came in and stroked Isaac’s head while I worked on the diaper. While he stroked his little brother’s head he said, “It’s okay, Isaac. You’re okay, Isaac.” Pretty sweet.

We’ve also had some conversations about Isaac when Besh and I have gone to the grocery store or some other errands. I pointed out that Isaac wasn’t going to be able to walk for a while because he’s so small.

“Yeah, he’s so small he can’t walk,” Besh agreed. “He can’t sit. He can’t talk. He can’t eat food. He can’t play games. He can’t drive a car. He can’t even juggle!”

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Two tales from the final pre-baby days

December 17, 2009

As we count down the minutes until Besher’s little brother arrives, wanted to record two tales from this past week.

The first happened yesterday as Sara and I were guest speakers at Besh’s class for circle time. Our topic: Chanukah. That’s an easy enough subject if you’ve been celebrating it for three decades or so, but what makes it challenging is presenting to a group of inquisitive three, four, and five year olds.

Hats off to Sara who tackled the actual story of Chanukah. I was trying to figure out how to tell the story without getting all scary with war and battles and a ransacked temple, but Sara dove right in and explained there was a war and Israel won. Well there ya go.

We then showed them dreidels and how (roughly) to play. Also spoke about menorahs and latkes before giving them some latkes for snack time (with sour cream and applesauce, of course).

Before latkes, Miss Aimee asked the class if anyone had any questions. Kids raised their hands and asked us the following:

“I got my haircut at my dad’s haircut place and I got a lollipop.”

“I think lanterns are hot when they are lit so you have to turn the fan on to cool them off.” (That was Besh)

“Chocolate milk!!!”

Miss Aimee then reminded the class what a question sounded like. Turns out we didn’t have any questions.

Second tale happened last night. At dinner Sara was telling Besh how tomorrow night (as I write this, tonight) was our final night just the three of us since his little brother would be here on Friday. Sara asked if there was anyplace special that Besh would like to go for dinner. Sara, being 9 months pregnant, and also being Sara, was a bit emotional while asking Besh. As her eyes welled up, Besh thought about his options and then happily proclaimed “I know! Wendy’s!”

Sara and I burst into laughter. Besh later admitted he was just kidding (we rarely go there, but that was a favorite of his until the unfortunate vanilla Frosty incident). Remains to be seen where we go, but nice to know Besh still has a sense of humor about all these changes.

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The Official Besher’s Little Brother Prediction Game (and you can win a prize too!)

December 14, 2009

Because everyone who knows me knows I love to play games.

So we’re going to have a little prediction game. Yes, the winner gets a prize. A fabulous prize. Not to mention bragging rights. Which is even better than a prize, when you think about it.

The rules:

1. To enter, submit a comment/response to this note with your prediction for three things: Besher’s little brother’s weight at birth, his body length (in inches), and the day/time of his birth.
2. For every ounce you’re off, you get a point. For every inch you’re off, you get a point. For every hour you’re off, you get a point.
3. The entry with the least points wins the prize and bragging rights.
4. One entry per person.
5. Entries are open immediately. They will end when I post something to Facebook saying we’re off to the hospital.

Now, some extra information. We’re scheduled for a c-section on Friday, so any entries suggesting the baby will be born after Friday–well that’s just crazy. We’re scheduled for the morning, but who knows what time that could be so feel free to take that into account (if you think we’re going the distance).

Besh was a bit over 8 pounds at birth. When we had his final sonogram (about a month before birth) he was estimated to weigh 5 pounds. Besher’s little brother, on the other hand, during that same one-prior-month sonogram, was estimated to weigh 7 pounds. But those are just estimates, so feel free to take that into account.

Oh, and the little guy’s femur was off the charts during that sonogram. I don’t expect him to come out being able to dunk a basketball (but that’d be sweet), but I give you that extra bit of information as well.

So don’t wait, enter now. Because the time to enter could end ANY SECOND!

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Mommy learns to read, Besher gets dirty

December 9, 2009

by Sara

Besh’s wonderful preschool put on a seminar this afternoon so that the parents could learn the Montessori approach to learning reading. Because the seminar was after school, Besh had to go to aftercare. Here’s the conversation we had in the car on the way to school:

Me: Besh. I have something to tell you. You get to go to aftercare today and play. Isn’t that exciting?!
Besh: Why do I need to go to aftercare today?
Me: Well, your teachers are going to be giving the other parents and me a lesson. So you get to play while I’m in class with your teachers. Isn’t that funny?
Besh: I don’t really want to go to aftercare.
Me: I know. I would rather come get you right when school is out. But Mommy has to take a class.
Besh: What lesson are they giving you?
Me: They are giving me a lesson in reading.
Besh: Don’t you ALREADY know how to read?’

I then of course explained that they were going to teach me how to help him learn to read. But his reaction was pretty funny.

It was very cute. In the end, he had a blast at aftercare. He got quite dirty (more so that usual at school). On the way to the car, he said, “Mommy – sometimes it’s really fun to get all dirty and messy.”

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Looking forward to his little brother: so far, so good

December 3, 2009

Quick story that comes courtesy of Miss Aimee, Besh’s teacher.

Each morning the kids in his Montessori class have circle time. A few days ago they used that time to talk about all the exciting things that were taking place in December. The children all raised their hands to contribute.

One child: “Santa comes!”

Another: “My Nana comes!”

Yet another: “We get presents!”

Besh: “I will have a NEW BABY when it’s vacation time!”

So, Besh, when you’re reading this (hopefully) in a few years–you were REALLY looking forward to your little brother. Hopefully you still feel this way.

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Besher’s first Broadway performance

November 25, 2009

Besh got back last night from his first trip to New York City with just Nonni and Zayde. Naturally, he had a blast. So much that on Monday he apparently had a bit of a fit in the middle of Times Square as he begged his grandparents to stay in the city for a few more days. Hard to blame him: all the M&Ms he can eat, Broadway shows, cheesecake, the giant Toys ‘R Us, taxi cabs. Heck, I want to go!

He was eventually persuaded to come home and we got to here all about the shows he saw. For the record, he saw three shows which is actually three more than I saw in NYC this year. One of the shows was Mary Poppins, which if you now mention to him will cause him to launch into a spirited song/dance performance of SupercalifragI’mnotgoingtotypetherestofit.

Thanks in no small part to the Kruger mojo, somehow Besher and grandparents got to go backstage after the Mary Poppins performance. No, don’t ask. I’ve found it’s better not to ask. But they went back and met the kids, Burt, and even Mary Poppins herself. Besh shook their hands, complimented them on their performance, and probably sang and danced for them a bit. You know, standard kid stuff.

But at one point Besh got to go on the Mary Poppins stage. Nonni stopped Besh and had him look out at the theater.

“Look, Besh,” she said. “This is what it’s like to be on a Broadway stage.”

“Yeah!” he replied. Then he decided to give an impromptu dance performance on a Broadway stage. Not sure how many other people saw it, and I’m sure he’ll be overlooked come Tony Awards time, but it’s always good to note important firsts, don’t you think?