Two legal lessons from a toddlerFebruary 24, 2009
Both from today.
First, how not to conduct a negotiation. Back when we were struggling with potty training, we’d established that Besh could have an M&M if he did a #2. Sometimes multiple M&Ms depending on…um…the M&Mness of it all. But he’s been using the toilet so regularly now that he rarely asks.
Tonight, however, he used the toilet and then looked up at me.
Besh: “I made poo poo in the potty! I can have one M&M?”
Me: “That was a super good job! You can have TWO M&Ms?”
“I can have five M&Ms? And four M&Ms? And one M&M and two M&Ms and three M&Ms and forty-eight M&Ms and ten M&Ms?”
“You can have two M&Ms.”
“Oh, okay. You put them in my hand?”
“Okay. Two M&Ms.”
Lesson learned: never negotiate against yourself.
Next up, depositions. While down in the kitchen I asked Besh if he wanted a snack.
Besh: “Oh yes, I want snake chips?”
Me: “What are you talking about?”
“And what are snake chips?”
“Food. You eat them.”
Lesson learned: when deposing an adversary or a toddler, if you want better answers, ask better questions.