Thinking it’d be cool to have this reaction recorded, but knowing how he loves cameras and he would just want to watch the video camera if we set it up, I decided to record the audio of our telling Besh the big news using my phone. So we all sat on the couch and I fired up the app. Here’s the transcript, maybe I’ll upload the actual audio later.
Besh sees me hit a button on the phone.
B: I wanna watch a video.
D: Well, it’s not a video. I was going to record something.
M: Of me, Daddy?
D: Yeah!
M: Listen, Mommy and Daddy have something very exciting and important to tell you that we get to tell you because you’re such a big boy.
Besh looks at the sound level indicator on the phone and decides they’re far too low.
B: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
We laugh.
D: Listen to Mommy.
M: And Daddy.
D: And Daddy.
M: This is exciting news.
D: This is super exciting news, Beshaboo. Are you ready for super exciting news?
B: Yeah.
D: You know John David? Yeah? Do you know Patrick?
M: Who’s Patrick?
B: Is he from the Tony Awards?
D: No, no. That’s another Patrick. That’s Neil Patrick Harris. No, Patrick is John David’s little brother. Have you seen that little baby?
B: No.
D: You haven’t seen him?
B: No!
M: Didn’t you see him at sing-song?
B: No.
D: No? (inside I’m thinking Crap, new tactic!) Well did you know that John David has a brother?
B: Yes.
D: You did know that?
B: Sure.
He reaches over to push the phone’s button.
D: Oh, you want to turn that on so you can see the numbers?
B: Yeah.
Screen comes on.
B: BBBBBLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!
D: Exactly.
B: HELLO {unintelligible}!
D: Wait wait wait. Okay. Do you know what? Do you want to hear something really exciting?
B: Mmm hmm.
D: There is a baby inside of Mommy’s belly.
Silence.
M: Isn’t that crazy?
D: How crazy is that?
Silence.
D: So in a few months–
M: Well, near Chanukah.
D: Near Chanukah. It’s a while away. We’re gonna go see the doctor and they’re going to take the baby out of Mommy’s belly–
M: When the baby’s ready. The baby is going to grow and grow and Mommy’s belly is going to get bigger and bigger.
D: Oh yeah!
M: Just like when you were in my belly! Now there’s another baby in my belly.
Besher laughs. Then leans into the phone.
B: Baa baa baa!
M: So after Chanukah–
B: Mmm hmmm.
M: We’re going to go the doctor one day and he’s going to say, “Yup, the baby’s ready!” and then you are going to be a big brother! We’re gonna have a new baby in our house!
Silence. He’s grinning.
D: How crazy is that?
B: I– I— I—
M: And you know what? If you want, you can help with the baby.
B: I wanna help with the baby!
M: If you want, when the baby comes out you can help with the diapers and you can help cover him up with the blanket. Because you’re going to be the big brother. You’re going to be the super big role model leader in our house forever because you’re going to be the big brother.
D: You’re going to be the big brother. You’re going to have to teach this new one all about how to do stuff in this house.
B: Yeah! I can show him how to take a nap. And if he mess around I will say to him–I will say–If you mess around I will go away from him.
D: You would go away from him?
B: Yeah! After he do some messed up…messed up stuff. Just…funny business in my bed.
M: But you know what, he’s not going to sleep in your bed. He’s going to have his own bed.
B: He’s going to have MY CRIB?
M & D: Yeah!
B: We’re going to bring that crib back to our house and the baby can sleep in that crib like I did?
D: Mmm hmm. What do you think of that, is that cool?
B: Yeah! He can put–he can–he can–he can put on the frog pajamas.
M: Oh, he can wear the frog pajamas?
Besh nods.
D: Aw, Besh that’s so nice.
M: You know what, when the baby’s born he’s going to be like this big. He’s going to be little. He’s going to be so little. And you know what? You can give him hugs and you can give him kisses.
B: He’d like that!
D: He would like that!
B: Well, I just have to tell him I broke my head.
(He bumped his head on the playground that day–nothing broke)
D: You have to tell him that?
B: Yeah, yeah.
M: You bumped your head on the playscape today?
B: I broke my head.
D: You broke your head?
B: Yeah, I did. Yeah.
D: Did they fix it?
B: No.
D: They didn’t? It’s still broken?
Besh reached back and tested his head.
B: No, it’s fixed.
D: Oh, it’s fixed, you’re right.
B: Yeah, I didn’t got broke.
D: Yeah?
B: Yeah.
M: You know what, Beshaboo? While the baby is in my belly, you can talk to him. You can say, “Hi, Baby, I’m your brother Besher!”
B: Well, I can’t see him.
M: No, you can’t see him. I can’t see him either. Mommy can’t see him and Daddy can’t see him.
B (laughing): He’s in Mommy’s belly button!
M: He’s in my belly right now!
Besh tickles Mommy’s belly.
B: Tickle tickle.
M: But that’s also why you cannot kick Mommy’s belly right now?
(Besh is very snugly, but also likes to push his feet up against you while snuggling)
B: Why?
M: Well, because the baby’s in there. Don’t kick the baby! But you can say, “Hi, Baby!”
(I resisted the urge to do a South Park impression, but it did cross my mind)
B: Well, I want to tickle him right now. Tickle tickle tickle.
We laugh.
M: The baby is going, “Hee hee hee.”
Besh finds this hysterical.
M: How crazy is that?
B: I can tickle him! Tickle tickle tickle tickle.
M: You are going to be such a good big brother!
B: How about you turn on this and you turn on the button and I tickle tickle?
D: I am! This is recording!
B: Well, I want to–
D: Oh, you don’t have to push it, it’s still recording. We’ll listen to it later. So what do you think, little man?
B: Tickle tickle tickle.
M: You think he’s going to be ticklish like you? You think he’s going to like being tickled just like you?
B (laughing): Yeah! But I want, I want–
D: You want to see all the buttons? See, it’s still going.
B: Okay. Tickle tickle tickle.
Brief interlude while we try to talk but he just wants to tickle the baby.
D: So what do you think, little man? Is that cool that you’re going to be a big brother?
B: Yes!
M: Are you excited?
B: YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH! (this is so loud, the recording distorts) Watch me, watch me! YYYYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
(The volume is equal parts excitement and wanting to see the bars light up)
D: Whoa, that’s really loud. You don’t want it to go that high.
B: Yeeeeeeeesssssssssssssss!!!!
D: Is there something you want to say to your little brother?
B: What is it?
D: We’re recording this and he can hear it someday.
B: He will hear it?
D: Yes. What do you want to say to him?
B: Tickle tickle.
